OK this should catch me up. Doc Shina said I need to get a Esophagogastroduodenoscopy before the lap band, so he schedules one for me. For those who did not get one basically they sedate you and put a camera down your mouth. No it is li9ke a surgery where you go through all the prep but no cutting.
So with that in mind that morning i am getting ready and I realize no clean underwear...I am like the heck with it i got to get stripped down for surgery any way so I roll commando. So I get to the hospital and the lady hands me a gown and says get changed but you can leave your underwear on.... UM Houston we have a problem. I figure no one will know so I strip down and get the gown on and everything is covered.
The nurse comes and tells me they are going to give me a sedative that will make me legally drunk for 24 hours and will severely effect my memory. Now for those that don't know I don't drink EVER! so this could be very interesting but how bad could it be right...Well apparently after the scope i was DRUNK! and I was showing my dick to everyone. Alice was there and when I sat up and tossed my legs off the side of the gurney I was just like HELLO WORLD. So the nurse sends her for the car and i proceed to get dressed and i just lose the robe and am like capt no modesty nd the world is my stage. So after my lack of fashion show I get put in the wheel chair. And at that moment i guess sitting in the wheel chair I got the idea that "hey I have wheels I must be speed racer.
So I stole the wheel chair. Now in my mind i was going 100 mph (insert me making vroom sound) the wind flipping through my hair.
Reality i moving like an inch every 5 seconds
The nurses are in hot pursuit " you can't catch me fools!"
Me moving so slow the nurses just watching
OH no a wall (Screeching breaks noooooooooooooo) CRASH!!!!
Reality i bump into the wall and stop I hear the nurses say leave him there he can destroy anything there.
Oh yeah scope says all clear!!!